3 Reasons Why Putting Yourself First Is Not Selfish
“It’s not selfish to love yourself, take superintendency of yourself, and to make your happiness a priority. It’s necessary.” ~Mandy Hale
I have to start off with how I pinpoint the variegated levels of self-care.
There is what I undeniability surface-level self-care. This would be things like getting your nails washed-up and taking a rainbow bath. Very important stuff but not the type of self-care that’s going to help you make the changes on the inside that create transpiration in your outside world.
Then we have deep-level self-care. I pinpoint this as working on things like setting and maintaining boundaries, learning how to reframe your mindset, and reconnecting with your inner voice. This is the type of self-care that can be really life changing. This type of self-care can modernize your physical and mental health, your relationships, your work/business, your overall outlook, and your wits of life. So it’s pretty important.
You see, when I was just thirty-nine years old, I learned the importance of deep-level self-care by way of force. I was working really nonflexible in a 100% legation sales job, and I was a single mom of three with no support system. I didn’t have the village part in the “It takes a village” proverb. On top of this, I was under a lot of stress from a recent difficult divorce and a move.
I was somewhat enlightened of my stress levels, but I moreover felt like I had no choice. I kept saying to myself, “I’m young, I’ll be fine.” I want to moreover add I was in the weightier shape of my life considering my way of dealing with the wrongness from my divorce was working out. So to say I was pretty vitrify was an understatement.
Then one day my soul said, “So you think you don’t need rest? Well, I’ll show you.” And I had a stroke, at thirty-nine. Yup, I was forced to learn how to rest and superintendency for myself.
This was a lesson I am now so grateful for. I’m here, with my kids. It was a long healing process physically. A whole other story, but it was moreover a whole healing process mentally. How to slow lanugo and, dare I say, put myself first. Who says that? No one, that’s who. It’s unquestionably a very unpopular opinion.
We still live in a hustle-type culture where our value is often judged by how nonflexible we work, how selfless we can be, and how many things we can succeed at once all while looking super hot and put together. Putting yourself first is looked lanugo upon as selfish and labels you lazy, and people often think you’re too sensitive or too soft.
I’m here today to share with you three powerful reasons why putting yourself first and practicing deep-level self-care is not selfish, but it unquestionably benefits everyone as a whole. Hopefully, I can help you stave a nonflexible lesson like the one I experienced.
1. When we start to take superintendency of ourselves at a upper level, we start to step into the highest version of ourselves.
We then get to share that version with everyone. Your partner, your kids, your work—everyone. When you show up for yourself first, you have increasingly energy, patience, and smart-ass space for everyone else.
Who do you think the world benefits from more—the stressed out and tired you that is running on empty, or the well-rested, sharp, kind, and patient you? Well, we all know the wordplay to that question. The world benefits when you put yourself first.
2. When you start making it a regular natural standard to put yourself first and superintendency for yourself at the deepest level, everyone is watching you.
All those same people. Your partner, children, parents, friends, co-workers—everyone. When they see how you superintendency for yourself and then how you show up for yourself and them, they then realize this is moreover possible for them and worth doing. You will automatically wilt a role model and a leader. You’re showing others what is possible for them too. I can’t think of anything largest to teach the world and my kids.
3. When you show up for yourself and treat yourself with this upper level of care, the way you deserve to be treated, you are moreover showing people the standard to which you expect to be treated.
People are watching you, they see how you treat yourself, and they know this is what you expect in your life, and nothing less.
Think well-nigh it. We all know those people that everyone knows not to mess with on any level. When they’re sleeping, working, taking that rainbow bath. Then we moreover know the person that’s worn out doing everything for everyone with nothing left for themselves. Who do you want to be? What do you deserve? I’ll tell you, we all deserve the very best. We teach everyone how to treat us by the way we treat ourselves. Once again, we are the role model for others to show them what is possible.
Now I believe there is no end to the benefits of taking superintendency of yourself at this upper level. What I hope you see today is the ripple effect it has on your unshortened polity and the world.
So how do we get started? Good question. I would love to share some of the first steps that are simple and free, but not unchangingly easy. It involves taking responsibility for yourself completely and knowing that you get to create the wits in life that you want to have.
The first step is to decide (before you have a stroke) that you are ready to make some changes and start practicing daily deep-level self-care.
An easy way to get started is to wilt enlightened of all the places in your life where you finger underappreciated, taken wholesomeness of, or slighted in some way. Where you find yourself saying things like, “No one overly appreciates the things I do, no one notices, and everyone just walks all over me.”
These are the places where you need to set and maintain some boundaries to protect your energy and your well-being. Boundaries lessen your stress and anxiety, they create space for rest, and sometimes they plane create increasingly time for you.
Some of the worldwide places we need to set boundaries are in our relationships, in our work life and merchantry and, most importantly, with ourselves. Also, alimony in mind that it is our job to maintain these boundaries and our job alone.
This is a perfect example of a work/business purlieus and a purlieus with myself. I used to work in real manor sales. This, as I said earlier, is a 100% legation position, meaning no matter how much you work, you will not get paid until you sell something and it closes. So most realtors are not good at turning yonder merchantry considering there is the thought of, what if I don’t get any new clients for a while? This is moreover workable to many other businesses.
The purlieus I knew I needed to set to protect my health and the time with my kids was that all calls I received without 6 p.m. would be returned the next day. This was on my voicemail message. This was a very easy purlieus to set but not to maintain.
This was increasingly of a purlieus for me. I had to let a prospective vendee go to voicemail knowing most realtors unchangingly wordplay their phones. But I knew if I didn’t respect my own boundary, no one would. This purlieus gave me the space I needed to unwind at the end of the day, and I unchangingly knew at 6:00, I was done.
When you create this space for yourself, you indulge yourself to turn off and just be yourself. You indulge rest, you indulge space and time for family and fun. You requite yourself the space you need to recharge for the next day.
You then get to show up as that well-rested version of you!
So decide to take responsibility for the way you get to wits life and wilt enlightened of the places where you need to set and then maintain those boundaries. Remember, boundaries are the foundation for all self-care.
Love yourself and superintendency for yourself at the deepest level daily.
About Tina Stinson
Tina Stinson is a Holistic Health and Life Coach who helps driven women reduce stress, anxiety, and overwhelm and step into the weightier and healthiest version of themselves so they can wits their weightier life! Tina is moreover the host of the Soul Aligned Self Superintendency Podcast, Visit Tina Here>> https://www.tinastinson.com.